10 Questions with Urja Refalo

• What led you to choose psychotherapy or counselling as a profession?

• I first came to psychotherapy in the early eighties. At this time I started my own personal journey by joining therapy groups, partaking in individual therapy and attending personal development trainings. Choosing psychotherapy as a profession became a natural step in my life’s journey, where I could then offer my support and presence, something of what I had been given in my own search for meaning and ‘who I am’.

• Which philosophical approaches have influenced your professional/personal development?

• I have been largely influenced by Gestalt therapy and meditation. Holism, existentialism, humanism, the eastern philosophies of Zen and Buddhism, some of which are the roots of Gestalt’s philosophical base.

• Which particular aspects of health or the human journey are you interested in?

• The ability to make good contact with one's self others is just so important. It can make or break the day. When a person is not able to make this contact/connection with one's self and others it leads to isolation, loss of meaning and depression. As social creatures who need to share... isolation and effects is far becoming one of our world's largest problems.

• What method/s do you use?

• I use the principles of contemporary Gestalt therapy. Working at the client's pace, being respectful and caring yet remaining in dialogue at a growing edge that is also conducive to growth. I will use art & creative medium and two chair work or what ever is creatively needed as an intervention. I also incorporate somatic experience and mindfulness.

• When do you think the client will start to feel that progress is being made?

• This will depend on what is happening for the client. Some clients are content after just 2-3 sessions, others 6-7 sessions and others will need more deeper therapy over a longer period of time. I always make a point of tracking progress, talking about this and the direction the client wants to take. Goals change over time and as one goal is reached the next emerges.

• How has therapy made you a better person?

• Therapy has helped me accept myself more and more. It has also helped me become more aware of my habitual patterns of relating which I am more able to recognise and change. Recognising my uniqueness, my abilities, my limitations and dreams have all been part of therapy.

• What do you like most about being a therapist?

• I like being able to be present and true for my client alongside being able to deliver 'skills' with heart and safety.

• Do you ever have 'bad hair' days?

• I certainly do have these type of days where my brain seems to be stuffed with cotton wool. Usually some quite time, a coffee and a hug straightens me out and gets me functioning well again.

• What do you think is the most significant problem we face, in the world today?

• The ability to balance life where there is pleasure to work, play and spend nourishing time alone is one of the greatest feats for us in our modern age. The inability to connect with self and others in fulfilling ways can leads to loss of meaning, loneliness and isolation.